How much should one actually let love change oneself?

How much should one actually let love change oneself?

He doesn't like your hairstyle. Or the fact that you love Hindi film music. He can't stand the fact that you relish roadside 'gol-gappas' much more than the exotic cuisines that are served in the most posh restaurants. Or if we just consider another case, she gets extremely annoyed just because you have a fetish for cars and automobiles, or that you like keeping a stubble. And it might just happen that you change these little things about you, for him, or for her (as the case may be). Rather, to put it precisely, for love's sake. But at the end of the day, all of us have to spare a thought for, "How much is too much?"

Love is the most compelling of all emotions. When it happens, we sail adrift on its high waves and often submerge ourselves in its overwhelming deluge. We often convince ourselves to give up certain quirks for the one we love. At times, those are not even quirks or eccentricities, but simply an inherent trait/characteristic about us. Still we part with a part of ourselves for that one person whom we consider to be our soul-mate. It of course sounds so very sweet and mushy. But come to think of it, how far should we compromise with our real self for that special someone? When do we actually reach the point when our inner voice declares, "No more! It is time to draw a line."? They say, love is unconditional. No complaints. No demands. Isn't it all being reduced to nothingness if you sever your ties with the very attributes that make you, you? If he/she loves you truly, he/she will love you with all your imperfections, flaws and frailties. We all have our share of oddities and peculiarities. If the person we love cannot accept us with all such things, then perhaps it isn't worth it. Love is not about being someone else and gaining their acceptance. It is about being yourself and winning their heart.

Individuality is what sets you apart from the rest of the world. Of course, there might be a few things that need to be improved or rectified, and it is always a healthy thing to strive to be a better person, be it in whatever terms. It is even more beautiful when love comes into your life, and as if in a sacred, pristine way, it purges you. You feel like a different person has been born anew. A better version of yourself. And you revel in this freshly-stumbled upon revelation. However, we also need to understand that if our love expects or wants us to change certain integral things about us, then it isn't what love is all about. And that is the juncture when you need to rethink the entire situation, introspect and decide for yourself, if you're losing yourself in the process of loving someone, who perhaps, does not even love you for who you are and only wants a tailor-made, customized person who conforms to their whims and fancies.

As long as the inevitable transition does not take a toll on your quintessential aspects, it is all a rosy affair. But make sure you do not metamorphose into someone who you would yourself not be able to identify, with or without your "sweetheart." Love madly by all means, take care of that person's desires and expectations, see to it that you're doing justice to the relationship to the best of your abilities, but do not be so carried away by the "winds of change" that you turn into a whole new person, minus the little things that define you- your tastes, choices, viewpoints, priorities, etc.

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